At last...

Today my mother told me that I have finally learnt how to write.

I wonder how it happened?

Wow.

'O Dorm on the Range....

...where the dear and the madly-in-love play...

Back at university once more, and sadly realizing that every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday speed-walking will be required to get from Calculus to Physics. Other than that, all should go smoothly - in matters regarding timeliness and attendance anyway. As for the content of the classes, well, only time will tell.

I am very confused as to why the bookstore is closed today. Classes begin tomorrow and tomorrow is the first day we can buy books? Not a particularly intelligent proceeding...

Christmas, New Years', and my twentieth birthday were all gay, jolly, and made ever-more irritating by my computer's hard drive dying and leaving me computerless and suffering internet withdrawal. Hence why there are no posts from winter break.

It might just be time to begin cooking dinner, so I bid you all adieu.

happiness and cheer

Once upon a time, I read in a very true, very sweet book this old bromide - "How heavily roll the wheels of others' joys when your own heart is sorrowful."

And though my sorrows are weighing me down, many needlessly so, piled upon my back because of my own flaws and superstitious little fears, as I wove around the city tonight, I was still happily aware of the beauty and joy of the season.

Memories warmed me, precious ones like glowing jewels on a queen's necklace, and images flashed past me - zealously decorated houses shining with thousands of lights and cuddled under fluffy white blankets of snow, a fir tree standing in an old house built by honest hands, covered with glittering ornaments and propped up by dozens of carefully wrapped presents, curling up in bed with a collection of Christmas stories on the Eve, surrounded by cats, chocolate candies and a radio playing carols, my little sister standing at a window, ringing sleigh bells to see if Santa would ride by in search of a missing reindeer, these and many many others in no chronological order.

I saw all of this whilst driving around aimlessly and realized afresh that though the past will never change, that though loved ones are lost, and that there are no guarantees of anything, there is a saving grace about life and human nature that allows us to be flexible and grow and rebound from any sorrow.

Merry Christmas, Feliz Navidad, Happy Hanukkah, Bona Saturnalia, and to any holidays that I have missed - Seasons' Greetings.

I'll find you something to drive before you drive me insane

Drove my brand-new 2008 Toyota Corolla for two hours today, from university to home. Considering I'd only driven it once before it was a fairly scary experience. Although, the cd player enabling me to listen to Fick and Subhumans all the way was lovely.

I usually love the drive on my way home and hate it on my way back to university and more slavish classwork, but today I found myself concentrating on driving more than I have since my very first driving lessons.

I couldn't enjoy the wide sweeps of grassy plain, nor the horse farms scattered so plentifully over the landscape...
I couldn't savor the blueness of the sky as as the winds scuttled clouds here and there as they rushed from one end of the country to the other...
I barely noticed the hawks making leisurely turns over the rippling grasses, heads angled down, straining for a glimpse of a furry tail...
The smooth action of a brand new engine was wasted on me as I sweated, trying to watch the road and the speedometer simultaneously...

Hopefully I'll enjoy the drive back more, being more used to driving this strange being. I miss my Geo so much that it becomes unreasonable; at what point must we grow up and let the idols of our past slip away?
I have a beautiful brand-new car, and I yearn for the sweet familiarity of the car I learned to drive in, faded and shaky as it was.
I am growing acquainted with my Corolla, but I still have no idea if it is a he or she (my Geo was indubitably a he), and therefore cannot name it. I refuse to christen my car some androgynous name.
However, time will cure all ills, and the Corolla will one day have an identity and a name.

I'm off to dream of dark curls and a strong grasp; his kiss on my neck and voice in my ear...au revoir...

strawberries

I am craving strawberries like there is no tomorrow...I haven't had any in ages, and the mere idea of the sweet, juicy berries is enough to make my mouth water...

number the stars

Tonight, wherever you live, no matter how far you have to go or how many layers you have to wear, go outside at night and go look at the stars.

Look at them, really look at them, sprinkled liberally across the heavens, gleaming with health and beauty and all the mystery of the beyond. Organized in ever-changing patterns, they spell the secrets of the future and record the tracks of the past.

Beauty in her purest form.