please tell me why

I stood in the Pacific ocean today, in a blue dress.  The waves washed around my legs as I stood and turned my face towards the West, into the sun.

I had dark glasses on so that nobody could see me cry; I wore a mask of makeup so that nobody could see the bruises on my soul.

As my blue dress fluttered in the wind the sand sparkled at my feet and I inhaled the salty breeze...little white shells danced in the ocean and seagulls moaned in the sky.  And all I had left to do was cry.

I put my hand up to my face and pushed away the tears, and laughed at little fishes waltzing round my feet, watching the plish-plashing gentleness of their home.  Oh the sparkle and glitter lightened my heart as I imagined the serenity of the deep sea, undisturbed by waves and humanity.

A gull stood at the water's edge, hoping for a gift, wary of a curse.  He cocked his eye at me, wondering to which clan I belonged.  I turned towards him but prudence overcame hope, and he flew away.

I turned back for one last look at the glittering glamour, and turned my face away from the sun, and the light, and slowly made my way home.